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  #1  
Old 06-28-2006
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TJ TJ is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Tucson Arizona
Posts: 564
Default American Red Neck Jokes (or truths)

You MAY be a Redneck If...
  • Your bumper sticker reads: "One more Whore and We Get Gore."
  • The nativity scene you set up in your yard at Christmas includes two pink flamingos and baby Jesus lying in a painted tire.
  • Most of your teeth are on a chain around your neck.
  • You hunt from your bedroom window.
  • Your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade.
  • You refrigerate your food stamps.
  • You use a 10 penny nail to pick your teeth after a night of road kill.
  • You have ever dressed your child as a "Snot-rag" for Halloween.
  • Your idea of a loaded dishwasher is getting your wife drunk.
  • If you see a sign that says "Say no to crack"...and it reminds you to hike up your jeans.
  • You and your spouse get divorced and you are still relatives.
  • You go to your local ice cream store and order Copenhagen "sprinkles" on your cone.
  • You know instinctively that red wine goes with opossum.
  • You're always looking to find your Mother-in-Law's picture on the back of a milk carton!
  • The officer that just pulled you over asks if "you have any I.D."...and you respond "About whut?"
  • You take a beer to a job interview.
  • You are caught roll'n your trailer down the street to jump start the heater.
  • When you finish eatin' your bologna you use the rind for dental floss.
  • You go to Goodwill to meet women.
  • You and your friends are putting an engine in a pickup, drinking beer, and the conversation is: Which county jail has the best food!
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  #2  
Old 06-28-2006
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CeeTee CeeTee is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: now: Torgau - Germany
Posts: 271
Talking absolutely superb

actually I match with aproximately 50% of above

better laugh over it

../ct

p.s. - I'm probably also so thick that still don't get the smilies here
Please TJ what to do to make them visible on my messages?
Some settings?
Programs?
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  #3  
Old 06-28-2006
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CeeTee CeeTee is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: now: Torgau - Germany
Posts: 271
Exclamation never mind

yeah, now I see them

never mind

thanks anyway

I knew I was thick (and I still am)

cheers

../ct
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  #4  
Old 06-28-2006
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CeeTee CeeTee is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: now: Torgau - Germany
Posts: 271
Default I got to stop this

I'll nevr buy cheap gin agaim
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